It happens when children are over a year old and start walking that suddenly they arrive at places we did not imagine, not only because they are standing, but also because they soon learn to climb on the sofa, chairs and if I hurry the furniture . This, coupled with the fact that curiosity is put to the highest level and that it seems they never have enough, makes them end up playing everything they shouldn't touch. In fact, it seems that they are more motivated to touch our own than theirs, and they end up being more fun our things than their toys.
Depending on what they take or want to play there is not much problem, but there are things that could be harmed and things that could break and are of value, and in this situation there are two options and many parents do not know very well which one to choose, that's why Today we will try to answer the question: Do we remove the vase or teach him not to touch it?
We teach you not to touch it, of course
The decision is not easy and depends a lot on the object we are talking about. I have said vase because it seems to me one of the most obvious examples, but it could very well be anything else. The fact is that on many occasions I have heard parents convinced that the best option is to teach them not to touch things, because hey, "they were already there before the baby arrived and he has to learn to value things for what they are, knowing what he can and cannot touch."
The concept is not bad, and you know that I really like talking to children and explaining what is right, what is wrong, what I like them to do and what I do not like them to do so that they go internalizing concepts and understand that, although they do not know, there are important things, there are things that can not be touched and there are things that are dangerous. However, I have not just been very friendly with this choice because it can be difficult enough to educate a child as well as add conflicts that we would easily avoid opting for the other solution.
We remove it, there will be time to put it back
This is my chosen solution. I vote for this one. When I say it, they usually tell me that I am very comfortable, that children have to learn, that they cannot live in a bubble avoiding all dangers, that they will think that everyone is safe and will never have respect for the things of others or fear for nothing and of course, it is easy to answer that it is not necessary to be so extremist and that, as in many things, everything is not black or white.
I explain myself: if we talk about the vase, we can try to explain to a child of one or two years that he does not touch it, yes, but if we explain it to him it is surely because we are seeing him approaching again and again. Come on, it catches your attention. Yes, we can tell you that it is Chinese, that it costs a lot of money (what will they know what the money is), that Dad loves it and that he would be very affected if it broke. The problem is that of all this you will understand half, and between the half that he understands and the innate desire he has to touch it, you can more your desire, because the half that has understood has forgotten it minutes after listening to it.
His body emits some impulses, a crazy desire to touch the vase, to know what happens if his hand reaches it, to have it in his arms, to see the colors closely, and before that there is no human word that can convince him to do what On the contrary, so, sooner or later he will touch it and the vase, sorry my friend, will break. Then you will get mad at him, you will not talk to him in one day, "I told you not to do it," "this child who does not learn, who does not listen, who ignores me," who "looks at how he laughs, that I believe who has done it to challenge me ", etc.
And not, he just wanted to touch itWho knows if he even sucks it, who knows if he even puts his head in it and has it in his hands. What a surprise, what a thrill, or what a gossip, which can also be, when it has disappeared when it falls to the ground and suddenly a lot of white pieces of something hard with many shapes have appeared. By the way, "why is dad screaming so much? It's scaring me ... Buaaaaaa !!!"
Well, if we had kept the vase up, it would still be whole, up there, waiting for us. Already, I know that now you want me to talk about overprotection, to put the child in a bubble and that he has to learn. Well come on, let's do it.
There are a thousand things that we cannot remove
We talk about a vase, like someone who talks about a laptop (by the way, I could have already taken it away, that Aran destroyed it when I was two years old) or any other mobile thing, which can be removed or stored. But nevertheless, there are so many things that children get the attention that we can't take away. We have the plugs, we have drawers in which to catch our fingers, we have windows that we do not want to approach, we have knives, forks, and a thousand things that touch or can touch and that we do not want to touch, so look for opportunities in a day, or in a childhood, to explain what they may or may not touch.
Knives, for example, are dangerous to care, but hey, we cannot remove them, but explain to them that they can be cut, that they can do a lot of damage, and in the meantime, until they understand it, we will continue to leave them on the table to use them , in their sight, but trying not to get caught or want to take them.
Therefore, by removing a vase, or by removing two, four or ten things from the house, the child will not live in a bubble. It's not that I don't want to explain that he can't touch it, it's that I prefer to explain it later, when I understand it at first, and so I save myself having to be watching day and night so he doesn't touch it, explain the same thing to him a hundred times, hit him in the hand while I say "that it doesn't touch, pam, pam" (I wouldn't do it, but there are people which he thinks is a good resource) so that later, in a mistake, you will shred something that turns out to be important and you put that murderous look of "I would kill you, but I don't do it because I love you".
It is simply, avoid something easily avoidable. Then, with four years and with an incredible ability to understand things, you take out your Chinese vase, put it where it has always been and explain to your son that you adore that vase as if it were a part of your body and your son will understand it at a thousand wonders If you want you can even play that you found in catacombs, such as Tadeo Jones, and that it is a relic that has so many, so many years, that it is of incalculable value, almost magical. The point is that once is enough. You will not have to go back explaining each time you approach how valuable it is nor will you have to run behind it while waving it in your hands and walking willingly and smilingly towards that piece of furniture that you always stumble upon.
In short, it is very difficult to fight his curiosity and that, if you intend to win, you have to work hard. Therefore, when in doubt, it is better to leave it for when your desire to touch things and know them through your hands can be satisfied with a simple explanation, that is, when they have grown.
Photos | Twentyfour Studentes, Dermot O'Halloran on Flickr In Babies and more | Unofficial gift guide for children up to 2 years (I) and (II), Teach children to help with household chores
